Introduction
Welcome to Heal Yourself, Change Your Life.
My name is Brandy Gillmore, and after recovering from my own life-changing injury, it’s become my mission to share with others the same discoveries I made that changed my health and my entire life. Our minds are truly incredible. The placebo is proof of this.
Each week, I will take this simple awareness to a whole new level. I will even coach live callers to free themselves of physical pain using only their mind. And then I’ll provide you with a combination of practical and spiritual insights that you can use to master your mind and your energy to help you heal your health, yourself, and your life.
Let’s begin.
Picking Up Where We Left Off Last Week
Hello and happy, beautiful day to you. Welcome back. On today’s episode, we are going to cover some really cool insights on healing with the mind. And I would say today’s insights are one of the key places that so many people get stuck, even when they’ve been working on healing for 10, 20, 30, 40 years and trying to get results and healing with the mind.
But there’s a stuck spot. And that’s what I love about today’s episode is you can see it. It’s just, it’s so there. There’s just so much clarity around it. And so that’s what I love. And of course, I love our volunteer. She’s an absolute beautiful, beautiful being. You’ll absolutely love her. But some of the things that we’re gonna talk about is just that stuckness.
You know, let’s be honest. More and more people are waking up to the power of the mind and healing, or needing to transform emotions or their mindset. And we see that all the time. And yet we also see all of the time, even when people have woken up to that awareness. That they’re still not able to get the results or they’re struggling or they’re stuck for some reason, or they’re stuck with this pain or that pain and they can’t overcome it.
It is the norm. I see it all of the time. And of course, that’s where I was too. You know, once I even knew about the power of the mind, I couldn’t get the results until I started working with the mind in a different way. And so that’s where we’re going today is exactly that, is looking at what is that difference?
What is that key? What makes the difference when you’ve been working on healing for a long period of time? Try everything that you possibly can. What is it? That’s where we’re going because, and you, again, you’ll be able to see it. So I love that. And I also love our beautiful volunteer. Her name is Dr. Kim Deramo.
And by the way, if you recall, I actually started working with her. On. I worked with her a, a session that was about, I thinking almost an hour long, somewhere in there. And so I cut it into two episodes last week and this week, because by the time I leave insights and information on it, it would be like a two hour podcast.
And that’s a long time. So anyway, so last week we started, or, well, last week we started with the first half of the session, and when I cut the session in half. What we talked about on the first half last week was we talked about she’s had pain going on for like 25 years, and it goes up and down and it keeps coming back and worse and better, and it’s, it’s just been really, really stuck.
Letting Go of Control and Reprogramming Emotion
And so where we started was we were talking about that, and then we were talking about this feeling of needing to control emotions, needing to try to control them. And part of the analogy that you hear me use, and we’ll talk about that even today, is the feeling of trying to control emotions versus having a new automatic response, like being programmed in at a deeper level.
Emotional Safety and Relationships
That’s the key. Achy to healing is that is really, really reprogramming at a deeper, deeper level. And one of the analogies that her and I were talking about, as I said, the example of feeling like you can, if you leave your dog off the leash and it runs away, well, you don’t feel safe, but feeling like you have a dog that’s not running to run away anyway.
You can just walk off leash and it’s walking around, hanging out. That’s a whole different. Animal, if you will. And a lot of times what happens is when people are trying to change, it’s like they’re trying to control the dog on a leash and it can feel hard and frustrating and like this big struggle on the inside to actually win.
Or we can just end up suppressing it and not realizing it’s there and and whatnot. So it’s just, it can be a little tricky. And so. That’s part of where we’re going as we step into today’s session. So just fun, powerful insights. And again, you are absolutely going to love Dr. Kim again. She’s just, she’s so sweet.
And by the way, if you haven’t listened to the first half of the session, then I strongly recommend doing so. Um, it’s very powerful and insightful as well. It’s got its own key nuggets and takeaways in that. And then today we are going to jump back into the second half of the session, so jumping into exactly that, the feeling of trying to control the emotions and instead of, and really look at taking it to the next level.
So that’s where we’re going as we step in with beautiful Dr. Kim. Here we go.
And I am gonna ask you a couple things. So one is bingo. Notice how, uh, if you’re tired, if you’re, uh, notice how you can get that frustration on the inside and you can get it built up and you’re trying to just put it on a leash. Can you see that? Okay. Now, if I ask you how much effort it takes to put on a leash, what would you say?
The Role of Guilt, Anger, and Fear
Tons, tons. Now outta curiosity, if you didn’t have that anger buildup, then how much would you need to worry about putting it on a leash? Zero. Zero. So I’m gonna ask you to breathe,
and if I ask you how much your husband goes into a pattern of anger, what would you say? Your current sweet, wonderful one. Very little. And if I ask you the X one, how much did he A lot. Lot. So you see how different people are programmed for different emotions, right? Yeah. So let’s say instead of trying to put your anger on a leash, that you program yourself for a different emotion.
That anger isn’t in your programming anymore, right? Okay. So I’m gonna ask you to breathe.
So notice what that would look like if you reprogram yourself that anger is not even, it’s not part of your response. Just like the difference between husband number one and and number amazing forever guy. Um, yes, there’s a big difference between the programming of anger, right? So I’m gonna ask you to breathe.
I want you to go beyond putting it on the leash and instead think about your current dog that doesn’t need a leash. How Wonderful. Freedom. Yeah. And then I’m gonna ask you to breathe
and notice your feeling of anger and upset, how it can go inside and you’re trying to put it on a leash and it goes up and you try to put it on a leash. Then if any comes out, you have a lot of guilt and a lot of self-judgment about it. Okay? And so I’m gonna ask you to breathe
that. Bingo. Bingo. Now what I want you to notice for a moment, so I’m gonna ask you to breathe. I want you to notice how when you get tired or overwhelmed or whatnot, part of what triggers isn’t just the anger, but there’s like a fear of failure or a fear of not doing things. So there’s a fear underneath.
Can you see that? Yes. Okay. So if I said so, so watch this. So I want you to think about the times that you’re getting overwhelmed or stressed. If there was no fear, like if there was no fear during that time, how would you respond to it?
Um, I mean, it might be kind of funny, just it would just be okay. It would just be okay. Yeah. So notice you’re having this fear that then comes out as anger and frustration and overwhelm and whatnot, that then you’re trying to put all on a leash. And so I’m gonna ask you to breathe
bingo. And what I want you to notice is like there’s a fear of failure. Not like in the bigger, bigger, bigger picture always necessarily, but there’s a, yep. Yeah, there’s a fear of feeling on everything. Like of, if I don’t get this done by this, th this done by th like, it’s, it’s every, you can see that, right?
Yes. It, it’s like a survival level. Bingo. Fear. Exactly. So let’s say I have a pattern of survival level fear, and I’m like, just calm down, put it on a leash. You know, that, that matches the childhood was like whatever the power in me was. I, I, I, it’s almost like he was just trying to control and put, you know, put it, suppress it, which can’t, it’s like impossible, but bingo.
I don’t know, somehow, and my dad did carry that like a, I don’t know if it was a fear of failure, but it was a judgment around like, superiority, inferiority. And he’s, you know, Mr. It, and like his brother’s like, how are you gonna do that? You know, versus my dad could do anything. There was a superiority of like, I’m the cool kid.
Bingo. Yes. Now I have a question for you. If I ask you deep inside how much you have been afraid, when even felt like the uncool kid, what would you say? All the time. Yeah. Growing up. Bingo. Yeah. Okay. So, uh, so I’m gonna ask you to breathe.
So if you knew that you would succeed, if you knew you would succeed, could you relax a little bit? Yeah. Yeah. So I’m gonna ask you to breathe.
All right, so let’s go ahead and pause it just for a quick moment. You know, I just first and foremost absolutely love her. What a beautiful, beautiful being. Second, I wanna provide just a really quick insight, and it’s just kind of to, to think about this in a deeper way is think about our reflexes. As a reactiveness, if you will, or another way to think about it is like, this is, imagine, have you ever done that maybe before where somebody, where you try to lean backwards, like if you were to just to let yourself go and completely fall backwards completely, if you’ve ever tried to do that before, to just let somebody catch you and fall backwards completely.
It can feel hard to do because your, your nervous system, your automatic reflexes. They wanna catch you, they wanna stop you, or you stop yourself. Okay? Or even having somebody come towards your eyes and don’t blink, it’s, it takes some effort because you have an automatic response to blink, right, to protect your eyes.
And so what happens is these emotions get wired at a deeper level, and instead of trying to control them, we must reprogram them. And that helps us to make a real change. At a deeper level in our lives. And by the way, I can tell you one of the, that was one of the keys, one of the many keys, if you will, as I was going through my injury of understanding the mind in a different way to get a different result.
And so that’s where we’re going as we step back in and with Beautiful Doctor Kit. Here we go.
Bingo. So I’m gonna ask you to breathe. Bingo. And where it wants to go. So I’m gonna ask you to breathe, and if I ask you, uh, bingo. If I ask you zero to 10, uh, how much you grew up feeling terrified of your father, what would you say? 10. 10? Mm-hmm. So I’m gonna ask you to breathe.
Bingo. Bingo. Now I want you to notice.
Bingo. If I ask you to notice zero to 10, how much you can find the feeling of still feeling terrified of men, what would you say? Definitely can 10. Feeling terrified of my father. Mm-hmm. And yeah, men comes up. Because if I ask you how much you find feeling of feeling terrified of your ex, what would you say?
Yeah, bingo. There’s also somebody. Near you in your town who you feel terrified of. Do you know who that is?
Gimme one second.
Bingo. Gimme one second. Bingo. Actually, I know this doesn’t make any logical sense. Can you give me your husband’s first initial please, Mario. Okay. So I’m gonna ask you to breathe, and if I ask you to notice the part of you who’s afraid of him, even though mm-hmm. It, it makes no sense, but it’s a projection that could go on him.
It could go on any, anybody, but Absolutely. That’s what holds back a more organic communication. Yeah. Notice he’s a terrifying guy, right.
It’s funny. Yeah.
So I’m gonna ask you to breathe. Do you think your kids are safe around him? Yes. Zero to 10. How much? A hundred percent Uhhuh. So I’m gonna ask you to breathe. So if your kids are safe around him, a hundred percent. Are you safe around him? A hundred percent, yes. So I’m gonna ask you to breathe,
and I’m gonna ask you to take in the feeling what it would feel like to know that you’re a hundred percent safe now. Oh my God. It would change my life. I can see what you’re saying. Bingo. I can see the subconscious projection and it’s. It’s not any physical threat. It’s if I were to share a certain way, like, or if triggered him, it would be like, I don’t know.
He would like verbally. Yeah. Um, like if I hurt him, this is more of an old pattern in our relationship, but he would make me wrong or attack me or my character or, and it would be very assaultive in my system where like. The guilt and the wrongness was so heavy, and we did have an episode when we were dating that he left me.
He just talked to the hand and completely shut me down because I bega I was, and I didn’t say anything that was at all reactive. I just was like, wow. I, ’cause I was confused in our relationship with like what he was saying and what his choices were. And I said, I, I just need some space. I’m gonna just kind of take my time and he gave me the, the, the fifth degree and didn’t speak to me for over a week and had all my stuff moved back to my house.
Like it was a very big fuck you. And, and perhaps in a way subconsciously registered like, don’t be that honest again. Don’t be that forthcoming. Yeah. With him. ’cause there’s a threat. Okay, now I have a question. Bingo. You had told him that you wanted things to just slow down and take, what? What did you tell him?
Well, I, we were moving forward. We knew we would get married, et cetera, et cetera, and he was saying things, but his actions weren’t really matching that, and I just was like, this is confusing. I don’t understand. Now, retrospectively, we’ve hashed this out. He was in this programming of his upbringing where like.
This is how you do it, this, then you do this, then you do this. So he was in this program and, uh, it wasn’t that he didn’t love me and wasn’t devoted, but it was confusing to me to understand like, why are you saying this and behaving like this? So I didn’t feel comfortable with that and I said, um, I’m just gonna stay on my own tonight.
And so he went home after we had gone out instead of staying with me. And he got so, felt, so rejected that he lashed out at me. By shutting it down. Wouldn’t take my calls, wouldn’t speak to me, wouldn’t return my calls. Okay. And had, um, you know, had all my stuff returned. Okay. Now can I say something for a moment?
Yeah, yeah. So basically he was telling you that he loved you and he was saying all these things, but he wasn’t doing enough to show it, right? Yeah. Like the devotion wasn’t there. He was. So, so wait a second. Yep, I hear you. So he was saying it, but he wasn’t quote, doing enough. So, so the devotion, et cetera, he wasn’t, it wasn’t the doing, it was more, I just couldn’t feel him.
Like, he’s like, I see stars for you. I see lights for you. And I just all of a sudden felt like these are just words. Okay, but I don’t feel you. Exactly. So notice for a moment, basically what you’re saying to me is, he was saying this and I didn’t get enough. So I wanted to punish him and tell him I was not gonna stay the night.
So you pulled away from him? Not for anything he was doing. He wasn’t doing anything wrong. He was do, he wasn’t. There was a discrepancy in his energy system, which was like, I’m over here. And his words were like, I’m fully devoted to you. And I didn’t even understand consciously what it was. I just knew like, I’m not comfortable like moving forward in our relationship.
So I gotta take a little space. Yeah. Okay. So I’m gonna ask you to breathe.
All right, so let’s go ahead and pause it just for a quick moment. I wanna point out a distinction that is really powerful and it’s this, it’s that when we’re working with the mind, of course, we never want to blame ourselves ever because that wouldn’t be helpful. But what can also happen is that. The mind can have a tendency to want to blame others and say, oh, or see it from one side.
The problem is, is that then you feel stuck and you can never really create the change that you want. And so, you know, basically a way to think about it is like, this is any argument. There’s two sides. And so if you can start seeing things from a different side, if you can really, uh, be willing to change or even admit something to yourself and be honest with yourself, self honesty can be liberating.
And so you’ll see what I mean coming up. It’s simple and yet it’s profound. It’s just kinda like this is, if I tell myself, well, let’s say I would said. Let’s say I a, a dog attacked me and I go, it just attacked me for no reason. Okay? Now I feel like it could just happen suddenly, and then I’d have to work through that.
Okay? But let’s say I poked the dog or I hit the dog, which I would never do. I love dogs. I love all animals, but let’s say I poked the dog and then it bit me. Okay, well, now there’s a reason why, and I could just tell myself, okay, moving forward. Don’t poke the dog like that. Right? And so, uh, and, and so my point is, is it gives you, it gives your mind more empowerment.
So there’s something that you can do also. And so if ever there’s a place, my point is, is if ever there’s a place where you can see that there’s some type of action that you could change, it’s empowering. If it’s done in the right way. But if you just blame yourself, that is not empowering, that’s problematic.
And so it’s, there’s a fine line because if you feel like a victim, that also can just create a victim pattern of, oh, I did nothing but this happened and I did nothing but this happened. So then that’s disempowering. So it’s, it’s a little tricky. And so that’s part of where we’re going as we step back in with beautiful Dr.
Kim. Here we go.
And bingo. So you could, if you tell yourself, if you on, if you communicate with honesty that that’s a problem, then you’re not gonna feel safe to communicate with honesty, right? So if I tell myself Drinking water is a problem, how’s that gonna go for me? Okay, so I want you to do yourself a favor and be very honest with yourself.
It wasn’t that your communication was an issue, it was your withdrawal and sudden pullback of actions that was the issue that hurt him. So if you said to him, Hey, this is how I’m feeling, I’m feeling afraid of moving forward, et cetera, et cetera, right? So if you said, look at, this is what I’m feeling. You provided reassurance and said, look, I’m here.
I wanna be, and this is what I’m feeling. So actually more communication would’ve done better. But you retracted and shut him out. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. I didn’t even know how to Yep. Communicate. I needed to kind of like get my own grounding. I hear you. But wait a second. Yep, I hear you. Now I want you to know my intention right now is what to pull up what’s really there.
Mm. It’s not just about pulling up my intention. What happens if you feel a hundred percent safe to communicate with him moving forward? How pivotal is that nature? Right? So my intention, I. Is to help you see that it’s not water, that’s the problem, or it’s not communication, that’s the problem. It was actually the lack of communication underneath and the pulling back that hurt him without clarity.
That made him reactive also. And so it’s safe to communicate. So it’s kind of like this. It’s safe to communicate as long as you don’t abandon him, it’s safe to communicate, right. Yeah. Now, how much safer does communication look moving forward? If you tell yourself, look, it is actually safer to communicate as long as I communicate with kindness and not reactionary, but communicating with kindness that’s safe.
Yes. Okay, so I’m gonna ask you to breathe now. If you tell yourself that he, uh, shut you out completely, and was reactive just because you’re commun you communicated, how safe is it gonna feel to communicate moving forward? Not say it, but notice that’s what you’re telling yourself. That make sense? Yeah.
Okay. So I’m gonna ask you to breathe.
So notice how he’s this big bear. He’s wonderful and he is amazing and he is hard on the outside and he also is sensitive on the inside. You can see that, right? Bingo. So I’m gonna ask you to breathe. So if you said that moving forward, it’s safe to communicate in your relationship when you just communicate with kindness and you don’t hurt him while you’re doing it, but you’re just communicating with love and with kindness, right?
Yeah. Okay, so I’m gonna ask you to breathe. Bingo. Gimme one second.
Bingo. Yes. Okay. So I’m gonna ask you to breathe, and I want you to notice the level in your neck and in your shoulder. Zero to 10. What’s your level like low, maybe two. Okay. So I’m gonna ask you to breathe bingo. And I want you to notice the part of you, and this is probably not gonna make any logical sense, but I want you to notice the part of you who’s kind of like.
Waiting for him to be reactive. Like, oh, if I do, he’s gonna be, it could be like the, that feeling. Can you find that in your nervous system?
I know. I can find that reference to my dad. Bingo. Um, so well kind of like this. If you, if you communicate fully, fully, fully, fully, how much are you afraid that your husband could be reactive?
Yeah, very much. Okay, so I’m gonna ask you to breathe,
and I want you to picture, if you communicate fully, fully, fully, his reaction is, Hey, let’s talk. And you communicate fully, fully, fully, fully, fully. And his reaction is, let’s talk and you communicate. Yes. Which it’s, that’s actually what he does. Yeah, exactly. So I’m gonna ask you to breathe
and so notice you’re safe. You’re safe,
you’re safe. And I’m gonna ask you to breathe.
Bingo.
I can. I can a hundred percent. See the part has been waiting for him to react. I love your awareness. I love your awareness. So I’m gonna ask you to breathe.
Gimme one second. Bingo. So I’m gonna ask you to breathe and I want you to notice this fight flight, fear of failure, um, over every little, like any little thing in this and this and big, small in between. Can you find that, that feeling of, of fear of failure? Like this survival feeling of fear of failure?
Yes. Bingo. Yes. Mm-hmm. So I’m gonna ask you to breathe, and if I ask you, where does that come from?
I, I, I, it’s related to how I was brought up and related to my dad. I mean, maybe even my mom and like the dynamic they had. Bingo. Um, but it’s, it was, it was a big survival fear. Bingo. After what just shifted. It, it’s more just awareness of what it was rather than feeling it here. Okay. But it’s been really foundational, even if it’s just their 2%.
Uh, it was always there, always, always, always. And, uh, now I’m actually just aware of what it was as opposed to like feeling it here. Bingo. Okay. So, um, we’re gonna go deeper there, but as soon as I start to move that there’s another piece. Okay. Um, and it’s just going back to the other piece. If I ask you on the inside, zero to 10, how big would you say your anger can get at times?
What would you say? 10. Mm-hmm. Now basically the spiral of feeling the 10 of anger. Then the part of you that’s afraid. So, so part of what’s fueling the, the fear of even your husband, but the fear and the guilt and the this and the, and the leash and the fear of letting go is exactly that. So even though you obviously do not love your dad, wanna be like you, if I ask you how much there’s a part of you that identifies that you might be a little bit like him, what would you say?
Yes. And in certain ways, I mean, he had a, a really strong work ethic. He was be like ahead of the game. Mm-hmm. He was extraordinarily successful and especially in relationship to, you know, his family and to other people around him. Mm-hmm. And I’ve definitely done the same, like always. I, bingo. Great. So let me, yep.
So lemme interrupt. So I’m gonna ask you to breathe and close your eyes. So I want you to notice the part of you that’s afraid of your own anger. Can you see that? Yes. And if I ask you zero to 10, how much you would say? Um, maybe 10. Bingo. Like knowing? Yeah. Yeah. So I’m gonna ask you to breathe, and I want you to notice that it’s like you have this.
Uh, fight flight survivor feeling to succeed, which then goes into like the overwhelmed feeling and, and what the agro frustration type of anger type of feeling that then triggers like the feeling of, of guilt and judgment about it and afraid to unleash it and afraid to say the wrong thing to your husband.
To afraid to then trigger him, to afraid to then, can you see the spiral? Yes. And I can see another dynamic in there, which was. With my dad as I got older, it was like, well, let me then trigger you and fuck you and you wanna come get me now and I’ll fight you. Like once I hit 13 it was like, well bring it on buddy.
But it actually stopped and I can see where I’m doing that. Bingo. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. So I’m gonna ask embarrassing to say, but I’m like, that’s pretty childish. But I definitely. Seeing where I, and I’m sure my husband is so aware of it too. Bingo. Um, bingo. Like even honestly when we were talking about the communication before, uh, way back in the past with your husband, there’s a part of you that wanted to kind of get him back, uh, for not being as devoted.
There’s a, there’s a getting back type of piece, um, that’s, that’s in there. So, uh, so I’m gonna ask you to breathe.
All right, so I wanna go ahead and pause it just for a really quick moment. You know, I said her husband, but I actually meant her ex-boyfriend. You know, when, when, but she got it. But it, but I just wanna make sure I’m clear. Is that the feeling of like, wanting to get him back because there was this feeling of unloved and it’s like, okay, but, but that’s the thing, is that when we communicate, if we communicate from a place of feeling hurt or feeling anger or upset or unloved or whatnot, what had, what tends to happen.
It tends to attract more of the same, so it doesn’t go the way we want it to. It kind of tends to go into the same type of pattern, or maybe we wanna get somebody back or hurt, whatever it it is. And so, of course, I. Genuine change and transformation is key. And so that’s where we’re going is just keeping it with an open mind and looking at things in a different way.
And so that’s where we’re going as we step back in with beautiful Dr. Kim. Here we go,
bingo. And I’m gonna ask you to breathe. And let’s say you don’t have any anger, you don’t have a trigger to anger. You don’t have that. You don’t have that at all. And instead of a feeling of fear of failure, you actually have an acute awareness. Like, oh, okay, this is happening. And if something comes up, let me be acutely aware.
What do I need to do or be right now? What do I need to do or be right now? Let me be acutely aware. Right. So, uh, so I’m gonna ask you to breathe. Bingo. Good, good, good, good. So I’m gonna ask you to breathe. Acute awareness. Gimme one second.
And instead of getting angry or getting fearful, you’re getting resourceful. Your habit is instead of getting ri or fearful, you’re getting resourceful. That’s just who you are. That’s just how you are. Instead of getting angry or fearful, it’s like you start to notice, oh, I’m feeling, what do I need to pay attention to?
What do I need to do? And so you’re really, really starting to change. What does that look like in your life if you really actually change? So you have a new programmed response, what does that look like? Unlimited success. Bingo. So I’m gonna ask fun. It would be like even more fun. To do what I’m doing.
Bingo. Okay? Absolutely. And so I’m gonna ask you to breathe.
Bingo. Okay. So I’m gonna ask you to breathe and to get there. What I want you to notice, so the feeling of guilt when you’re upset, the feeling of guilt, you can’t have a pattern of guilt. Not only that, but you’ve gotta make sure integrity, integrity, integrity is super important. So feeling in integrity, being in integrity, super, super important.
Does that make sense? Yes. Great. So I’m gonna ask you to breathe. Good, good, good, good, good. Great. And I want you to notice your level of pain. What’s your level? Zero to 10? Less than one, I think. I feel like, yeah, it’s like a half. Great, great, great. Like very mild. Fantastic. And so I’m gonna ask you to breathe
and I’m gonna ask you to picture what it looks like moving forward. If you’re off the leash and you don’t have anything to run away, you don’t have anything, you need to suppress that you can be completely off leash and you’re good, you’re in flow, you’re harmonious. There’s nothing to worry about unleashing ’cause it’s not there.
You’ve changed on the inside. You’ve really repo, reprogrammed and re patterned your mind. There’s nothing off the leash. You don’t have any worries about being off leash. It’s actually nice, it’s free, it’s breathable, it’s fantastic. And you’ve really, really changed the internal patterns, the internal triggers, so you’re really responding in a different way.
I’m gonna ask you to breathe. Good, good, good, good, good. And I’m gonna ask you to breathe and notice your level of pain.
#### Now it’s, it’s almost just the idea of it like that. Okay. And if I ask you, if you push on it, what’s your level? Um, maybe like a two. Okay. So I’m gonna ask you to breathe one. Okay. Two. So I’m gonna ask you to breathe and I want you to think about your wonderful husband and think about the awareness if you can even be off leash around him, and he can be off le leash around you, and
everything’s completely, completely safe. And you can just relax and he’s not trying to hurt you and you’re not trying to hurt him. And it’s actually a hundred percent safe. Like you guys are just this amazing, wonderful, sweet power couple, which you are just a beautiful, wonderful, supportive couple of each other.
It’s beautiful and brilliant, and I’m gonna ask you to breathe
and notice that it’s safe. It’s so. Safe and lovely and wonderful. No, no need to attack him. No need to defend. No need to him attack. Like it’s actually just safe to both of you be off leash and just be in love, which is beautiful. I can feel how much you love him, by the way. It is so sweet. So I’m gonna ask you to breathe great.
And I want you to push in that same spot and what’s your level one Bingo. Great. And, uh, gimme one second. And, uh, and if I ask you now with your father how safe he is, what would you say?
Oh,
what would you say? Not safe. Not safe at all. Okay. So if I ask you how long you were around him. Zero. Okay. So I have a question. Yeah, a hundred percent. I’m safe. Okay, great. So do you need fear? No. Okay. So, uh, bingo. So I’m gonna ask you to breathe.
Bingo. Bingo. And could you let go of your anger towards him? Yes. Really? Could you just, could you just really have compassion for him? Yeah. If I ask you honestly how much he tries to be his best self, what would you say? A hundred percent. Exactly. So notice he’s trying, it is not lack of effort. He’s trying to be his best self.
Yeah. He’s just clueless. He, he doesn’t know. Yeah. Consciousness is key, right? He doesn’t have the consciousness and he gets aggravated and stressed and fearful. Yeah, and triggered. Now think about, by the way, noticing the not being the cool kid, so to speak. Notice how much fear of failure you would expect him to have in his life.
Totally. Like worthless if you’re not, you know. Achieving or, um, better than everybody else. Okay. So I’m gonna ask you to breathe.
And he is just doing the best he can. So instead of anger, instead of anger, instead of anger. Instead of anger, like you said, clueless. Have compassion. Yeah, have compassion. It’s kinda like this.
Bingo. Did we go somewhere different today than you thought we would?
I, I had the awareness that this is a hot topic that’s still there, so I probably could have, could have guessed and pointed that. Okay. Um. And I’m glad because lately I have been more aware of this relationship with Mario Block, so that’s coming up in my awareness as well. Okay, so bingo. Bingo. Okay. Now the, that, that, that.
Bingo. So then even as you say that, I would say that the piece that needs to change is even deeper than your thinking as you said that. Okay, so, so let’s go here. So I’m gonna ask you to breathe
and let me put it in another way. Bingo. Let’s do this. If I ask you zero to 10, how much you feel that holding on to anger. Actually protects you against Mario, what would you say? Yes. I know that’s just a hypothetical. Mm-hmm. It’s like, yeah, holding onto anger protects me in life. Holding on. Exactly. So I’m gonna ask you to breathe.
Yeah, exactly. So I’m gonna ask you to breathe. So notice, so what I was asking you even previously, so I was asking you about the anger towards your dad, if you could let it go and have compassion. Yes. So there’s a theme here because it’s kind of like this. So let me mirror this to you. So let’s say I have a ton of anger and I feel like it’s keeping me safe.
I need the anger because it’s gonna keep me safe. I need the anger. By the way, I can’t let myself go off leash because of the anger. And I feel like I could do something to my husband, my relationship, my this, my that. And I’m critical of myself for having the anger. And I feel guilt for having the anger.
But by the way, I feel like. The anger is, uh, is keeping me safe and I need it to protect me. How does that feel? Yeah, that’s been true in my system. Stuck. Okay. So I’m gonna ask you to breathe. Yeah. Mm-hmm. So notice what I was asking you is if instead of anger towards your dad, if you could have compassion and intelligence, it’s kinda like this.
Do you know that you shouldn’t step and walk in the middle of a freeway? Yeah. Yeah. I mean, do I know I shouldn’t be in a room alone with him? Absolutely. Wait, wait. Yep, yep, yep. So I’m gonna ask you to breathe. Mm-hmm. Bingo. Oh, so, so I’m gonna ask you to breathe. So you wanna link it up in your mind though?
Yes.
Oh. So notice for a moment the idea of letting anger go. Feels like what?
Um, I, like I won’t be protected or I’ll be taken advantage of. Okay, so watch this. So if I said I’m gonna go ahead and let go of anger and I feel like I’m not, I’m gonna be taken advantage of and not protected, how easy is that? Uh, easy to let go. Yeah. Not, it wouldn’t be not okay. But now I have all this anger, and now I feel like I can’t let myself off the leash and I have to control myself and shut myself down.
Be, and I’m trying to control it because I have all this anger worse. Okay? But I can’t let it go because then I’m gonna be unsafe and I’m gonna be taken advantage of. I’m willing to let it go anyway. Even though the programming is saying that you can’t, willingness, willingness, you have to reprogram.
That’s the part that you’re missing, so you’ve got to reprogram it. So in your nervous system, so it feels safe to let it go. Willingness to let it go and programming yourself to let it go are two very different things. Okay. Got it. Okay. So I’m gonna ask you to breathe.
So how clearly do you know that you shouldn’t walk in front of a, uh, in the free, in the middle of the freeway? Yes. How much anger do you need for that to tell you that? Zero. Zero. Okay. How clearly do you know that you shouldn’t jump off of a cliff? 10. Do you need anger to tell you that? No. Okay. So.
Clearly. Do you know you shouldn’t jump out of a plane with no parachute? Yes. Do you need anger to tell you that? No. So wait, are you sure anger‘s keeping you all that safe? Zero.
You see the difference? So I’m gonna ask you to breathe. So now without anger, what’s gonna happen? Nothing. You’re still gonna have wisdom, only good things. You’re still intelligent. It’s not keeping you safe. Does that make sense? You don’t need it. It’s not, you’re still intelligent. Anger‘s not keeping you safe.
So are you sure you’re gonna be taken advantage of without anger? Zero. You are gonna be unsafe without anger. Zero. Ah, yeah, I can a hundred percent. Bingo. So I’m gonna ask you to breathe. So you could let anger go completely and be off leash even with your husband. Now, I know anger definitely keeps you safe in your relationship with him.
Right? Wow. You definitely are gonna need that with him, right? Yeah. It just freed me to like have a real conversation with him that could make real changes. Ah, versus like it wouldn’t really make any changes. Bingo. Now, notice also when I say to you, oh, anger really helps out in your relationship. Notice how different the consciousness, how it just consciously feels even different.
Do you notice that? Yeah. Ah, okay. So I’m gonna ask you to breathe and I’m gonna say, yeah, go ahead and keep anger in your relationship and hold on to the anger inside of you. Tell yourself it’s helping you, or you could let it go, right? So. Bingo. Great. So I’m gonna ask you to breathe bingo, and I’m gonna ask you to breathe.
I notice you don’t need to criticize yourself for anger. You don’t need to feel guilty about it. You just actually need to reprogram it in your nervous system, right? Yes.
Oh my God, this is so pivotal. We have to have a bigger conversation about this one day. ’cause this is like so multidimensional. Thank you. Right, right. Yeah. So I’m gonna ask you to breathe. You see the change? Yep. Yeah. And if I ask you your level of pain, what’s your level of pain? Zero to 10. Zero. Ah, good.
Make sense? Yes, I, I mean this is also like a whole other thing of like not wanting to be in a program and that was like the fuck you fight resistance of like, I’m not gonna be in a program. Yeah. Versus like, okay, you can be in the program and no, you’re not the program. It doesn’t mean you’re less, okay, so I’m gonna ask you to breathe.
You mean program as far as pattern? As far as, okay. But the thing of it is you’re actually changing your programming. And that’s what we want. That’s what we want. Yeah. Like when you said reprogramming it versus I’m not in a program, so I’m free willingness. Yeah. Which is like, okay, you don’t need to not be in a program to be free.
You can be free and be in a program. Yes. But in a positive programming. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Bingo. I love that. So I’m gonna ask you to breathe
and.
#### It feels good, doesn’t it?
Oh my God, I can’t even tell you like, it’s like my whole life has been centered around getting out of the program and. What I just got was like, I’m in a program and I love it. I’m in a program and it’s awesome. Which is really like conscious embodiment. Sacred embodiment. Divine embodiment, like so would I be?
Yes. So what I call it is positive emotional programming. So getting rid of the negative emotional programming, but establishing. Positive emotional programming. So now being in a positive program, because imagine if I looked at my computer and I said, I want no programs on my computer. You’d be like, what are you gonna do?
Stare at it all day. So if I have a bunch of negative programming on my computer, that would be a problem. But if, imagine if I have a positive programming on my computer, that’s everything. Right? So, yeah, I love that. I love it. Honestly brilliant and beautiful and I love it. Honey, it has been such a pleasure connecting with you.
Thank you so much. It was divine intervention all the way. I’m so thankful. I love you so much. I’m so grateful to you. You are absolutely so, so welcome. It has been absolutely divine intervention and I just, um, and I love that and fantastic job with your pain and your awareness and your insights and just fantastic.
Fantastic. It’s beautiful. Thank you. You’re welcome. Beautiful. Thank you. I love you. I can’t wait to see you again.
All right, so let’s go ahead and bring everything together. And again, I just absolutely love her. What a beautiful, beautiful being. And I just love these insights just because this is the norm that I see is so often people are feeling that feeling of stuckness, that internal struggle where they even know like, oh, I need to get rid of these negative emotions.
I need to get rid of this pattern or this pattern. And yet. It’s wired in the mind at a deeper level that keeps it in the reflex. And not only that, but I have to say, I. Typically speaking, it’s usually linked up for multiple reasons, and this is why is that when you think about it, if, if we have a pattern for 10, 20, 30, 40, 50 years, it can show up for different reasons in different ways.
And so it’s key when we just understand it and we rewire it in the subconscious mind, it’s like that emotional reflex, if you will. It changes. Now you don’t feel like you have to try to control your emotions all the time instead of transforming them. And that is the key. And that’s like, and not only that, but re-patterning.
So it’s powerful and it’s pivotal. And notice I just loved her. Like, oh my gosh, like this is a, like it just beautiful, beautiful being. And that’s how it feels like when you really. Really get it. Now, again, I’m gonna be honest because I’m always, there’s typically multiple, multiple reasons why things can get stuck in the subconscious mind, but it.
It when we start to just rewire them, it’s pivotal. So when we, the key, if you will, is making sure to, of course, work with the mind in a different way. Now the other thing is you want to notice is that even with her husband and, and, um, talking about, you know, the emotions that came up and whatnot, where she’s got, you know, different fears.
That’s the other thing you wanna keep in mind as well, is that. The subconscious mind can be counterintuitive, and just because it doesn’t make logical sense sometimes we say, oh, well that’s not logical. And so we negate it instead of rewire it where we say, oh, I have this fear. Oh, that doesn’t make any sense.
Or, oh, I feel guilty, but I shouldn’t. So, and we just pretend like it doesn’t exist. I did that very thing during my injury also, so it’s. This is good because during my injury I learned basically I did pretty much everything you shouldn’t do. I did that and so, uh, it was good that I learned from my mistakes.
And so that’s ultimately what you wanna do is make sure that if you have some type of emotion, that you really, genuinely change it at a deeper, deeper, deeper level. It is truly liberating. So that said. And by the way, if you’re somebody who is newer to mind body healing or doesn’t understand the, the training yet or whatnot, I do have a free training that is available on my website.
And if you are somebody who gets this, who’s been doing this, who’s been on the journey for a long period of time and starting to see, oh, if we just work with the mind in a different way, it actually works. So, so true. Um, I have a deep dive also video course that is absolutely incredible that. Goes through all of these specific things, the nuances, the details, the specifics of why people are stuck and what you wanna do instead, and also how to rewire the mind, but also the common reasons that things get stuck at a deeper, deeper, deeper level.
It’s really powerful and eyeopening. So I. That said, if you’re, if you’ve been there and you’ve been stuck, come join my video course. It’s, uh, the most amazing transformative video course I’ve ever, ever seen. So the link will be in the notes as well. But either way, this is the biggest thing, is the more people get results, that’s what we need and that’s what I’m excited about.
And so, um, I love that you’re here and. I’m so happy you’re here, and if you could please take just a quick moment to hit the share button on this episode, that would be great. You know, share it with somebody you love, somebody you care about, or somebody you don’t even know, because the more that every single person in our world is healthy and happy, and loved and loving.
The better this world is for all of us. And so please do take just a quick moment to hit the share button and please do make a point to having most wonderful, incredible rest of your day, and I look forward to connecting with you on the next episode. We’ll see you.
Thank you for listening to Heal Yourself, change Your Life. All of the time people reach out and say how much these episodes have given them hope or touched their heart, or helped them stay positive in hard times, or even woken them up to a completely new level of awareness of how amazing we all really are.
If today’s episode touched your heart or expanded your mind in any way, please do me a favor and be sure to share it with those you care about or those you know who really need it. As more and more people become empowered, it really will change our world for the better. That is the point and the power of these demonstrations is to create a radical shift in our world consciousness by showing everyone what we are all capable of.
And of course, each volunteer will really need to follow through to reinforce their programming, to maintain their results. But the point is. For you to see that you really can create rapid results in your health and your life if you really understand how to use your mind. You are incredible. And I do wanna be clear though, that most people will not get results this fast on their own.
I make it look very easy because of the discoveries that I made. You’ll wanna remember that there’s so much more going on in our minds at a deeper level than people realize. That said, if you wanna send me any questions or comments, come visit me on my [email protected] slash podcast. And if you’re currently experiencing physical pain and would like to be a volunteer on the show, you can sign up there as well.
Lastly, I. Please remember, if you do have any health issues, you won’t want to avoid your doctors. Instead, you’ll wanna continue seeing them and make it your goal to blow their minds with what you are capable of with your mind. Thank you.
