Introduction
Welcome to Heal Yourself, Change Your Life.
My name is Brandy Gillmore, and after recovering from my own life-changing injury, it’s become my mission to share with others the same discoveries I made that changed my health and my entire life. Our minds are truly incredible. The placebo is proof of this.
Each week, I will take this simple awareness to a whole new level. I will even coach live callers to free themselves of physical pain using only their mind. And then I’ll provide you with a combination of practical and spiritual insights that you can use to master your mind and your energy to help you heal your health, yourself, and your life.
Let’s begin.
Setting the Stage & Introducing Dr. Kim
Hello, and happy, beautiful day to you. Welcome back. On today’s episode, we are
going to be talking about, of course, healing and transformation, but also we’re
going to talk about feelings of trust and confidence and self -trust and how that
can actually relate to healing and transformation and just that deeper level,
those pivotal insights. And so that’s where we’re going. And by the way, today we
have a beautiful guest. Her name is Dr. Kim D’Eramo, and basically,
it’s kind of interesting. You know, a lot of times when I bring on a volunteer, I
haven’t met them before, so a lot of times the volunteer, when they came on, they
come on. It is the first time that we’ve ever met. However, in this case with Dr.
D’Eramo, we actually met at a conference. We were speaking at the same conference
about a month ago, and As we were speaking, it was like a retreat.
We met in the green room, we were talking, we had lunch and she’s just, she’s so
beautiful and wonderful and sweet and lovely and so we were just talking and during
that time she mentioned she’s had pain for many, many, many years. So about 25
years and she’s been struggling with that and so I mentioned I’d be happy to assist
and then what was funny is what folded from there. So that was basically on a
Saturday is when we met. We spoke all of that about a month ago. And then a week
later, she was leaving town, so she was leaving LA. And I was actually flying out
for my brother’s wedding. So you may have heard me recently. I mentioned that I was
traveling for my brother’s wedding, but we were both traveling and we both took an
early flight and it just so happened. I mean, The airport was almost empty. It was
like 5 a.m., maybe even before that. But literally, I was sitting there waiting for
my flight, working on a few things, catching up on a couple emails to just send
out a town so, or send before I left town so I didn’t need to, you know, really
do anything while I was traveling. So I was finishing those up and I heard this
voice next to me. She goes, “Brandy.” And we were literally sitting right next to
each other. We just looked up, it was so funny and she was working on her
computer, finishing up probably some things from the trip. I didn’t know what she
was doing, but either way, it was so divinely perfect that we were sitting there
with very few people in the airport at four or five a .m. in the morning
and literally sitting right next to each other. So we were laughing about that, of
course. And From that we went ahead and set this up and said okay. Well, let me
let me help you with that pain, and so It’s just a beautiful so my point is just
a beautiful beautiful being divine Unfoldment if you will and I love that and of
course the message from today is also just divine Unfoldment so just really really
beautiful. You’re absolutely going to love her dr. Kim Deramo and On that note,
let’s go ahead and dive in with our beautiful volunteer, Kim. Here we go.
Session Begins with Dr. Kim
Hello. Hi.
Hi. Hi. How are you? gorgeous. You look absolutely beautiful.
Likewise. Likewise. It’s so wonderful to see you. Yeah. – Yeah, we had a lake.
The kids are off for summer. So I’m like doing some work -y things, but I’m mostly
like in summer. So it’s kind of like a mix. – I love that.
I love that. And I just love that we ran into the airport together. It’s just, I
mean. – Oh. – How perfect. – How perfect. – Yeah, that was fantastic.
– Yeah. – You ready to dive in? totally ready to dive in. I’m really excited to do
this with you because as you’ll see, it’s been kind of a pervasive issue.
And I’m like, just, I’ve always just been like, okay, I’m really curious what’s
going on, but it’s not really budged, you know, like with all the things I know to
do.
– It’s gonna be fun. It’s gonna be fun. I like that. And how long has been going
on, by the way? 25 years, but on and off. The last maybe five years,
much more significant, like a weekly basis of the headache or migraine or using some
ibuprofen and then it really didn’t work any more the way it used to. So more of
like a front burner, but it’s been there for like 25 years and intermittently really
problematic. Yeah, ’cause you know, migraine. So in the beginning and like more now,
it’s been more. – All right, and let’s do this. Let’s dive in, okay?
And thank you. All right, and if I ask you also, by the way,
so the migraine, but if I ask you also the neck pain, what’s your level? It’s
right here around C3 and then it’s right here like on top of that maybe second rib
or third rib Right on top of that second rib right there and it kind of is like
a spot right there And then there’s a spot right there and it feels like the
primary is here. So okay, and the C3 also, okay Being it,
and that’s what you were saying. Okay, and great, okay, here we go. And by the
way, if I ask you zero to 10, what your current level of pain is right now,
what’s your current level? – Actually today is probably like a one. Well,
I mean, right there is always when I get it, I’m like, oh, I just want to grab
in there. So that’s like a, I don’t know, like a four or five where when I start
rubbing in, it feels good, But if I’m just sitting here, it’s like a one, which is
my usual. And then when it flares up, it’s, oh, the pain is probably only to like
an eight. But whatever neurologic stuff comes along with it is like 20,
where I, I just, it’s so all -encompassing. Okay.
All right. I got you. you. Okay. Last night, I said late and it’s a lot of times
when I haven’t had all the sleep I need is a trigger. Okay.
Okay. And if you push on the area right now,
Bingo, it’s about a five, five, six and we’re in there. Yeah. Oh, it’s like,
okay. – Yeah, it’s like, and then in here, it’s also always a little junky right in
there. – Okay, all right. Bingo, I got you. – Okay,
so here we go. All right, you ready?
Yes? – Yes, yes, yes. – Definitely. – Yes, yes, yes. – Okay, so Bingo.
Uh, so the first thing that comes up, okay, um, bingo,
okay. So the first thing that comes up, there’s a feeling of feeling, um, of guilt,
um,
bingo. If you get a little, uh, stressed out, it’s like you’re hyper focused not to
ever want to take it out on your husband or kids or whatnot. Uh, But there’s a
feeling of,
are you familiar with that? You see that feeling, a feeling guilt, but when you
get, it’s like a feeling if you get a bit stressed, you’re hyper -focused to not
take it out on others. Can you see that?
– I can see that I hyper -focused to manage it myself versus share it with others
and like be seen or, I guess, not consciously, but be vulnerable. It’s almost like
this pattern where instead of sharing what I’m feeling,
I’ve got to manage it. I can handle it. Okay. Okay. So there’s that. So I’m going
to ask you to breathe.
All right. So let’s go ahead and pause it just for a quick moment. You know, first
and foremost, I just love her. I love her heart. I love her being. She’s just
beautiful inside and out, just an incredible beautiful being. And there’s a few
insights that I want to share with you. You know, first and foremost, part of the
reason that I paused it here is because what you’ll notice is that as we step back
in, you’ll notice as we keep talking, her pain actually starts going up instead of
down. And that’s the reason that I want to share with you a few insights. And
first and foremost is this. You want to make sure not to hang out in the negative.
So we kind of go into the negative when we’re over here a bit too long in the
negative. And so as you’re working with your mind for healing, you want to make
sure don’t sit in the negative, don’t get stuck in there, don’t stew in there as
soon as you start identifying it to make sure to shift towards the positive. And
you’ll notice, by the way, she does do that. So even though her pain comes up, she
does a fantastic job at shifting it away and gets it back down. So she does
incredible. So I love that. So that’s one insight. Another insight is this,
is that so often people overlook the importance of the positive. And you’ll notice
when I work with even all of the time, you know, in my courses and whatnot, I’m
literally saying, you know, as soon as we identify the negative, what do we need to
do? We really need to start going into the positive and rebuilding and rewiring and
creating that change. And so just remembering to remember that is key.
And then number three is this is that, you know, some, sometimes all of the time,
people may have pain or illness or problems, and they’re not sure which emotion.
It’s connected to it, you know, if it’s what it could possibly be. And obviously,
of course, if you start talking about a certain person or a certain situation or
circumstance, and your pain starts going up, or the illness or problem, then of
course you know that there’s something around it to explore on what it could be.
And so that’s where we’re going as we step back in with Dr. Kim. You’ll notice how
the peripheral emotions connected to the situation. You’ll notice the pains going up,
and then you’ll notice the emotions around it have a bigger meaning. And so that’s
where we’re going as we step back in with our beautiful volunteer, Dr. Kim. Here we
go.
Funnies, as we started talking about it, it’s flaring up to like a tooth. It’s like
probably a 3E, that this whole thing and this knack are more triggered.
More triggered. Okay. Yeah. Uh -huh. Um, bingo. That.
That.
All right, so I want to go ahead and pause it just for a really quick moment, you
know again first and foremost I just love her. I absolutely love her secondly I
wanted to provide you just with a quick insight or distinction if you will when it
comes to Healing and also emotions escalating now in this moment,
of course, I asked her about her pain and as she went into the emotion, it went
- Now, some people might think, oh, she was talking about the illness, so the
illness or the pain increased, but that’s not typically the case.
And this is what I mean. I mean, if you think about the last almost 300 episodes,
all the time, I work with people who are having pain and we you know, what’s your
level of pain? And then 99 .9 % of the time, you know, it goes down. We’re working
with it, going down, etc., because we’re taking their mind in that direction. And of
course, with hers, we, you know, dove right in, and so it increased it a bit, and
that’s great. It’s okay, because she’s going to bring it back down, and she does a
fantastic job. But my point is, is that we talk about, you know, in all of them,
we say, “Okay, Well, what kind of, where’s your pain? What level is it? And then
we bring it down. So in this case, as we’re working with her, it’s not just that
we’re talking about where is your pain, but what’s happening is the emotions around
it are increasing. And a way to think about it is like this. You know,
an unfortunate example, let’s say somebody, their dog died 10 years ago or something
like that, or their favorite grasshopper, we’ll say that, their favorite grasshopper
died, so it’s not emotional for anybody, but if they had a death or what not in
the family or something like that, that still, when they think back to it, they may
have hurt emotions come up or something like that, so that’s more along the lines
of what we’re experiencing is that as we’re talking about this circumstance, there’s
emotions coming up and what you’ll notice by the way is as we go deeper in there’s
other emotions that come up there’s some tears that come up and there’s some hurt
and that she’s been you know suppressing and burying because she’s just this fierce
fantastic amazing woman who’s you know who’s had these emotions that were suppressed
at a deeper level you’ll notice there’s a there’s a such a strength in her but
there’s also a burying of emotions which is exactly what I used to do so I get it
so well and understand it because you know it’s that feeling when you want to just
keep going and so you try to suppress what’s really bothering you and so it’s just
beautiful watching her and her self –awareness and really changing the emotions is
just it’s really really beautiful and impressive so that’s where we’re going but the
insight that you want to think about is exactly that the buried emotions and really
being willing to transform them and so that’s where we’re going as we step back in
with beautiful Dr. Kim. Here we go.
And so if I ask you right now to notice the level right now and how much it’s
gone up what’s your level right now?
three, maybe four. Okay, so I’m gonna ask you to breathe. Okay,
so normally when you talk about it, it doesn’t necessarily go up so quick, right?
But right now,
yeah, it’s going up. Okay, so this is what I want you to notice is notice how you
said that when you get more tired and you don’t get enough sleep or whatnot or
you’re getting tired or whatnot, it can be a trigger for when it happens, right?
Okay, so
bingo. Basically what I’m seeing in your energy is this,
is let’s
Um, okay, so I’m being, how do I, uh, notice,
notice how you have a hypersensitivity to people taking their anger out on others or
being mean to others or verbal abuse or this or that or the other. If I ask you
how much you have a trigger towards people being mean or verbal abuse or et cetera.
What would you say? – It just makes me think of my ex -husband and he was just
really verbally, he was an asshole and verbally horrible. And this started when I
got together with him. My dad was abusive.
I guess you could say verbally, but it was more physically,
But yeah, just that’s what it makes me think of us. And so now if yeah people are
yelling That did used to be more of a trigger and I guess subconsciously it’s still
probably in there Okay, so what I would also say the other thing is is this is
Is it’s kind of like if I’m judging anybody who’s wearing a blue blazer And I’m
feeling like those people with the blue blazer blah blah blah and then I realized
that I’m wearing one I Can have a hypersensitivity to oh my gosh. I never want to
wear one, right? It’s like a hypersensitivity So in other words, yeah judging myself
for being like a verbally abusive person and making sure I don’t Get like that.
So maybe that actually inhibits me from like Expressing myself as organically versus
like repressing it and then
with my husband, my awesome husband, now I’m married again, where I probably could
be more forthcoming with how I feel, but then I’m holding back because I don’t want
to be critical or I don’t want to be, I’ll make him feel bad or so maybe that’s
what you’re pointing at. Bingo. Okay. So I’m going to ask you to breathe.
All
Insight: Don’t Sit in the Negative
Insight: Escalating Emotions & Deeper Triggers
Funnies, as we started talking about it, it’s flaring up to like a tooth. It’s like
probably a 3E, that this whole thing and this knack are more triggered.
More triggered. Okay. Yeah. Uh -huh. Um, bingo. That.
That.
All right, so I want to go ahead and pause it just for a really quick moment, you
know again first and foremost I just love her. I absolutely love her secondly I
wanted to provide you just with a quick insight or distinction if you will when it
comes to Healing and also emotions escalating now in this moment,
of course, I asked her about her pain and as she went into the emotion, it went
- Now, some people might think, oh, she was talking about the illness, so the
illness or the pain increased, but that’s not typically the case.
And this is what I mean. I mean, if you think about the last almost 300 episodes,
all the time, I work with people who are having pain and we you know, what’s your
level of pain? And then 99 .9 % of the time, you know, it goes down. We’re working
with it, going down, etc., because we’re taking their mind in that direction. And of
course, with hers, we, you know, dove right in, and so it increased it a bit, and
that’s great. It’s okay, because she’s going to bring it back down, and she does a
fantastic job. But my point is, is that we talk about, you know, in all of them,
we say, “Okay, Well, what kind of, where’s your pain? What level is it? And then
we bring it down. So in this case, as we’re working with her, it’s not just that
we’re talking about where is your pain, but what’s happening is the emotions around
it are increasing. And a way to think about it is like this. You know,
an unfortunate example, let’s say somebody, their dog died 10 years ago or something
like that, or their favorite grasshopper, we’ll say that, their favorite grasshopper
died, so it’s not emotional for anybody, but if they had a death or what not in
the family or something like that, that still, when they think back to it, they may
have hurt emotions come up or something like that, so that’s more along the lines
of what we’re experiencing is that as we’re talking about this circumstance, there’s
emotions coming up and what you’ll notice by the way is as we go deeper in there’s
other emotions that come up there’s some tears that come up and there’s some hurt
and that she’s been you know suppressing and burying because she’s just this fierce
fantastic amazing woman who’s you know who’s had these emotions that were suppressed
at a deeper level you’ll notice there’s a there’s a such a strength in her but
there’s also a burying of emotions which is exactly what I used to do so I get it
so well and understand it because you know it’s that feeling when you want to just
keep going and so you try to suppress what’s really bothering you and so it’s just
beautiful watching her and her self –awareness and really changing the emotions is
just it’s really really beautiful and impressive so that’s where we’re going but the
insight that you want to think about is exactly that the buried emotions and really
being willing to transform them and so that’s where we’re going as we step back in
with beautiful Dr. Kim. Here we go.
Insight: Emotional Triggers & Pain Patterns
And so if I ask you right now to notice the level right now and how much it’s
gone up what’s your level right now?
three, maybe four. Okay, so I’m gonna ask you to breathe. Okay,
so normally when you talk about it, it doesn’t necessarily go up so quick, right?
But right now,
yeah, it’s going up. Okay, so this is what I want you to notice is notice how you
said that when you get more tired and you don’t get enough sleep or whatnot or
you’re getting tired or whatnot, it can be a trigger for when it happens, right?
Okay, so
bingo. Basically what I’m seeing in your energy is this,
is let’s
Um, okay, so I’m being, how do I, uh, notice,
notice how you have a hypersensitivity to people taking their anger out on others or
being mean to others or verbal abuse or this or that or the other. If I ask you
how much you have a trigger towards people being mean or verbal abuse or et cetera.
What would you say? – It just makes me think of my ex -husband and he was just
really verbally, he was an asshole and verbally horrible. And this started when I
got together with him. My dad was abusive.
I guess you could say verbally, but it was more physically,
But yeah, just that’s what it makes me think of us. And so now if yeah people are
yelling That did used to be more of a trigger and I guess subconsciously it’s still
probably in there Okay, so what I would also say the other thing is is this is
Is it’s kind of like if I’m judging anybody who’s wearing a blue blazer And I’m
feeling like those people with the blue blazer blah blah blah and then I realized
that I’m wearing one I Can have a hypersensitivity to oh my gosh. I never want to
wear one, right? It’s like a hypersensitivity So in other words, yeah judging myself
for being like a verbally abusive person and making sure I don’t Get like that.
So maybe that actually inhibits me from like Expressing myself as organically versus
like repressing it and then
with my husband, my awesome husband, now I’m married again, where I probably could
be more forthcoming with how I feel, but then I’m holding back because I don’t want
to be critical or I don’t want to be, I’ll make him feel bad or so maybe that’s
what you’re pointing at. Bingo. Okay. So I’m going to ask you to breathe.
All
Insight: Expression vs. Transformation
Alright, so let’s go ahead and pause it just for a quick moment. You know,
again, I just absolutely love her and I just love this insight and where we are
right now and it’s this. It’s that, you know, so often people will do the very
thing where they’re suppressing their emotions because they feel like they really
shouldn’t tell others. And so they’re kind of, they’re trying to suppress them or
control them, but then they end up coming out in different ways,
or they just suppress them and hold them in, but then they say,
“Oh, okay, well, I need to just start communicating them.” And they think that the
answer is then to start communicating all of their emotions. And I would say, I
know most people would say that that’s the good thing to do is start communicating
their emotions, and I would say, “I disagree, and this is why.” Think about this
for a moment, okay? So imagine if there’s somebody who has a very judgmental mind
or a very critical mind. So they’re feeling critical emotions and critical emotions
and critical emotions and critical emotions towards this person and this person and
this person, and they say, “Well, I don’t want to suppress my emotions, so I’m just
going to start telling everybody how I feel. And they’re critical, critical, critical,
critical. You’ll be like, “Wait a second here.” And so they literally start doing
what? Either suppressing the criticism towards everybody, or voicing the criticism
towards everybody, and neither one is good. So the real answer is transformation.
And yes, if there’s something that you need to communicate. Absolutely communicated,
of course. Communication is important and key for healthy, happy, wonderful
relationships. However, if there are patterns of feeling,
of frustration, or of anger, or upset, or hurt, or whatever it is, and a pattern,
and a pattern, and a pattern, communicating the same thing over and over, or even
just expressing the patterns over and over and over, it doesn’t become helpful, it
becomes hurtful. And not only that, but sometimes if we have a, like let’s say
somebody has a pattern towards somebody else. They’re frustrated with their husband or
wife and they realize they’re frustrated because they can’t control it. And they want
them to do what they want them to do. It’s like, well, wait a second. Maybe you
don’t have a right to be frustrated. We can’t control each other. That’s not what
we’re here for. And so I would say before just suppressing the emotion or just
communicating it, if it’s a negative emotion, really look at it, analyze it.
Is it part of a pattern? If so, be willing to change it. Is it even true? Is it
even a fair emotion? You know, sometimes people will feel really frustrated towards
somebody else and they feel that and then when they check in, they go, “Oh, I
realize I’m feeling frustrated about other things and just taking it out on that
person.” And so That’s the thing you want to really look at is not that you’re
always spraying your negative emotions everywhere. And the reason I say that is
because I can’t tell you how often people do these very things. They get into
spirituality and self -help and personal development and then they think, “Well, I
need to communicate all of my negative emotions to everybody.” And it’s like, “Well,
wait a second. What about transforming your negative emotions? What about checking
yourself about seeing is it true? Is it not true? Is it right? How to communicate?
Because ultimately, the best communication is of course from a loving place. So we
don’t want to communicate all of our emotions. Oh, I feel frustrated. I feel this
if it’s negative. Instead, it’s a lot more productive to communicate solutions, to
communicate. Even if we said, okay, well, look, I’ve been feeling this way and I’d
really love like so so it’s it feels productive so when we communicate we can
communicate with love and from a place of productivity like what do we really want
what do we want to change what needs to change what is the issue what do we want
because if we’re always just venting then of course it’s not really productive it’s
not really getting you where you want to go or creating the change in your life.
And of course, the more you can resolve the emotions and then just communicate from
love, that is incredible for relationships. So just food for thought.
And just kind of taking in that awareness just because I see that all of the time
and not necessarily, as you know from, as you can see with our beautiful volunteer,
you can see she’s just suppressing them. And by the way, You can also see that she
just, I mean, I’m sure you can feel this, how much she loves her husband and it
is just so darn sweet. It is just, I love that about her, just so, so,
so sweet, so beautiful and as far as making the change, there are a couple other
key pieces to really start shifting at a deeper level. And so that’s where we’re
going as we step back in with our beautiful volunteer, Dr. Kitt. Here we go.
So I’m gonna ask you to breathe and
I want you to notice all of the feelings towards this topic of the X being yada
yada, verbally abusive, etc. You see that, right? Yes, okay,
so I’m gonna ask you to breathe and
and I want you to notice the self judgments that if you’re not perfect in this and
that like how much you have the Self judgments about all of this stuff. Can you
see that big time big time? Okay, So I’m gonna ask you to breathe.
And I’m gonna ask you, what would happen if you stopped beating yourself up and you
stopped having all of these judgments? – The programming is like you would be more
abusive because being more unleashed and more critical,
uncensored, hurtful, maybe destructive, Yeah, of the things that I…
Okay, yeah.
Destructive. The program is like, “Oh, you’d be destructive.” But in the truth, it’s
like, it could be destructive of the things that are ready to fall away. But the
fear is like, it would be, “Yeah, I’d regret it.” And God,
it’s exactly, it’s huge, very significant, causing a lot of problems for me. Bingo.
Now, the other thing is, is I want to invite you even as you’re saying that, so
instead of saying it would be destructive, because how safe does it feel if
something is destructive? Yeah, it might be destructive of the things you care about.
It might be bad. Okay, well, what if you said it’s transformative? Yeah. If you’re
communicating in a way that then becomes transformative in a positive way, how does
that feel to
You’re definitely right on it, because there’s all this resistance that says as long
as I learned to do it in the right way versus like totally being unleashed,
of course. Bingo. No. Great. So I’m going to ask you to breathe. Now, notice what
you’re saying. So watch this. If I said versus totally being unleashed, which would
be be good. Okay but wait a second. If I said being free or being unleashed so
there’s a part of you when you get upset.
Yes but it’s also is afraid of it’s kind of like this is that okay let’s go like
this.
Have you ever had dogs before?
No. Oh my God. Yes. Yes. And I’ve had a history that are really like traumatic.
And we do have a super sweet dog now. Okay, so let’s go here. Let’s go here.
Exactly what’s coming up for me. It’s exactly that energy. Okay, so let’s go here.
Your current dog. How much do you have to keep him on a leash so he doesn’t run
away? Zero. Zero. So what if he’s unleashed? Yeah,
it’s actually safe. Oh. So I want you to notice how when you feel about
communicating, you’re afraid to be off leash, unleashed. Well, if you’re unleashed and
you’re out of control, that’s a problem. If you’re unleashed and you’re in control
and you’re okay, that’s a good thing. it’s freedom. This is the energy with my dad
like he just didn’t know what to do with me and so he was trying to control me
because and then maybe I just got that download like I’m not I’m not safe well no
obviously got the download because I physically was not safe okay so it did imprint
somehow that like I’m not safe to be fully amish I have to be careful okay so I’m
gonna ask you to breeze
of self -trust, of trusting self to be off leash. Now in her case there are
specific things from her childhood that are creating this and so often people can
lose trust in self for a variety of different reasons and that’s what I want to
talk about for a moment is exactly that and because if we lose trust in self it’s
harder to change. It’s harder to transform. It’s harder to feel secure in life if
you can’t even trust self. And I lost trust in myself and in my body going through
my injury. And so I want to give you a few insights regarding making sure that you
have trust with self and you really feel that. Now, one thing that I did going
through my injury to really reestablish self -trust was this. is that if I said I
was going to do something, I made sure to do it. Now, this may seem small, but
all of the time, you’ll see people who might do this. They go, “Oh, I’ll do that
today.” And then maybe they don’t feel like it. So they say, “Oh, I’m going to do
it tomorrow. I’m going to do it the next day. I’m going to do it the next day.”
Now, you might think, “Okay, well, it’s procrastination.” Yes, but it’s also Losing
trust in self, even though you may not realize it. It’s like you start to realize
you don’t trust yourself to follow through. And I see people do that all the time,
but what happens is they may not realize that it’s even affecting them,
but on the flip side, if you know that you’re a person where you do something and
you say you’re going to do it and you do it and you say you’re going to do it
and you do it and you say you’re going to do something and you do it, it is a
feeling of confidence, of trust in self that it can build so much in your life as
simple as it may or may not sound to you. And so that’s the insight actually,
and that’s the reason that I want to pause it right here is I want to invite you
to look at how to establish or strengthen trust in yourself.
You know, with myself personally, I know that I have trust in myself.
That if something occurs, I can figure it out. If there’s some type of thing to
figure out, I will do that. If I say I’m going to do something, I will follow
through. I know that about me. And of course, during my injury, I didn’t because I
would say, “Oh, I’m going to try to do this or try to do this.” And whatever it
was, and I couldn’t count on myself to show up. And it’s not a criticism. It was
re -establishing trust. And so a few things that I did to re -establish trust during
my injury was exactly that. If I said I’m going to do something, I did it. So
even as I was getting better and better, if I said that I was going to go to the
gym one day and let’s say that it even got late and I hadn’t yet gone after I
got better, I would go at like 10 o ‘clock at night, 11 o ‘clock at night, didn’t
matter. If I said I am going to go to the gym, I went. If I said and told
myself I am going to do something, I did it no matter what. Now, even before that
in my injury as I was getting better, for me to even just set a time to go do
something. So, one thing that I did is I started volunteering at this homeless
shelter. You know, as I was starting to feel better and better, I, there was this
homeless shelter that was, it was like a housing, temporary housing, where it was
like a homeless shelter, temporary housing, where women, single women with children
were basically going to look for jobs and they got help with their resume and they
were trying for jobs and then they would, and what I would do is I would go in
and play with the children. So I would go play like Connect 4 or Monopoly or
whatever it was, some type of game. So this was my volunteer service, right? And so
it was like, I think it was like every Wednesday at 11 o ‘clock. And for me to
commit to something and then go to it was also re -establishing trust.
Being there, being on time and doing that was re -establishing trust with myself
because I mean, prior to that, if I said I wanted, like especially during my injury
and getting injured, you know, I would be like, okay, I’m going to go back to
work. And then it didn’t, I failed. I couldn’t. And so doing that so many times
did, it made me lose my trust with self. And so reestablishing that trust was so
important. And so I just want to give you food for thought. Now, by the way,
Another thing that I did during my injury that I that was actually ruining my trust
with self Was actually affirmations, and so I had to stop doing them So I had been
for years during my injury doing a tons of affirmations. I am happy.
I am happy. I am healthy I’m whole healthy complete yada yada like I did all of
these different Affirmations for years like five plus years every day every day every
day writing them saying them speaking them but they weren’t true at the time and so
I it didn’t help me build trust with myself so I stopped doing them and started
rewiring my mind in a different way which was really helpful you know and a simple
thing you know like in my courses and whatnot that I teach is even just doing a
technique where it’s like sea mind, sea mind. So you’re pointing things out to your
mind that are true in a positive way instead of telling yourself things that aren’t
necessarily true. And that was, you know, there were so many key things that I did
with the mind that just tweaks or did things in a different way that were just
pivotal. And so I didn’t realize initially that telling myself, myself because I’ve
been telling myself every day during my year, “I am so happy. I am so happy.” And
I wasn’t. But I logically thought I was, but it wasn’t really creating that shift,
that feeling. But it was also telling myself, “I’m healthy.
I’m healed. All of these things.” It wasn’t healthy for me the way I was doing it,
just in affirmations and affirmations and writing it and all of that, I really
needed to rewire my mind and really think in a different way and see in a
different way and program in a different way and feel in a different way. And so
that was key. So my point is, is that really the more you can establish feelings
of trust and honesty and count on yourself, that makes you have a feeling of
confidence. And when you don’t feel like you trust yourself or you don’t feel like
your, you know, can count on you. What happens? It can increase fear and
uncertainty. Like you feel afraid of the future. You’re gonna be able to make it.
Are you gonna be successful? Are you gonna do this? Are you okay financially? Are
you okay in a relationship? Or whatever it is, it actually increases more feelings
of insecurity as well. And so just food for thought. That’s the question that want
to prompt you with today. So I want to invite you, if you will, to look at your
level of trusting self. Because as you trust self, it creates more feelings of
security, more feelings of confidence. It’s a great foundation for that. And the more
you trust self, the more you can heal, the more you can flourish in life. So it’s
really beautiful. Now, going back to Dr. Kim’s situation, as far as not trusting
herself and it’s a different programming that she has linked up. As far as that
goes, we’re going to go deeper on the next episode.
We’re going to go even deeper and look at why that was linked up at a deeper
level and that feeling of feeling like out of control or whatnot. There’s more
programming there, but first, sticking with the positive, I want to invite you to
take in the positive, to bring in the feeling of establishing or feeling, feeling,
feeling so much more trust in self, and feeling that, and embracing that.
So just food for thought today on that, and maybe even just write down one or two
things that you could do or start doing to really start increasing trust in self,
or maybe even stop doing. So maybe You might have a habit of telling yourself
you’re going to do something and then you don’t do it Okay, so maybe it’s not
telling yourself. You’re going to do something unless you really really are you know,
and it’s kind of like if you have a spouse or an employee or co -worker a boss or
Anybody friend family who constantly says I’m gonna do this and then they don’t they
say I’m gonna do this and then they don’t know You lose the ability to feel like
you can count on them even if you don’t consciously realize it. And so just those
same feelings towards self are so important to make sure that you’re nurturing that
positive connection with self. And so just food for thought, inviting you to look at
this in your own life and taking this in of feeling trust towards self because it
may seem little, but it really is an incredible foundation for confidence, for
success for flourishing. So, food for thoughts, and we’ll go in deeper on the next
episode. And for now, I ask if you could please take just a quick moment to hit
the share button on this episode. You know, share it with somebody you love,
somebody you care about, or somebody you don’t even know, because the more that
every single person feels happy and healthy and loved and loving, the better this
world is for all of us. And so, please do take just a quick moment to hit the
share button and please do make a point to have a most wonderful incredible rest of
your day and I look forward to connecting with you on the next episode. We’ll see
you there.
Thank you for listening to Heal Yourself Change your life. All of the time people
reach out and say how much these episodes have given them hope or touched their
heart or helped them stay positive in hard times or even woken them up to a
completely new level of awareness of how amazing we all really are. If today’s
episode touched your heart or expanded your mind in any way, please do me a favor
and be sure to share it with those you care about or those you know who really
need it. As more and more people become empowered, it really will change our world
for the better. That is the point and the power of these demonstrations is to
create a radical shift in our world consciousness by showing everyone what we are
all capable of. And of course, each volunteer will really need to follow through to
reinforce their programming to maintain their results. But the point is for you to
see that you really can create rapid results in your health and your life if you
really understand how to use your mind. You’re incredible. And I do wanna be clear
though, that most people will not get results this fast on their own. I make it
look very because of the discoveries that I made. You want to remember that there’s
so much more going on in our minds at a deeper level than people realize.
That said, if you want to send me any questions or comments, come visit me on my
website at brandygillmore .com /podcast. And if you’re currently experiencing physical
pain and would like to be a volunteer on the show, you can sign up there as well.
Lastly, please remember, if you do have any health issues, you won’t want to avoid
your doctors. Instead, you’ll want to continue seeing them and make it your goal to
blow their minds with what you’re capable of with your mind. Thank you.
Live Coaching: Self-Judgment & Suppression
Insight: Trust in Self
Alright, so let’s go ahead and pause it just for a quick moment. You know,
again, I just absolutely love her and I just love this insight and where we are
right now and it’s this. It’s that, you know, so often people will do the very
thing where they’re suppressing their emotions because they feel like they really
shouldn’t tell others. And so they’re kind of, they’re trying to suppress them or
control them, but then they end up coming out in different ways,
or they just suppress them and hold them in, but then they say,
“Oh, okay, well, I need to just start communicating them.” And they think that the
answer is then to start communicating all of their emotions. And I would say, I
know most people would say that that’s the good thing to do is start communicating
their emotions, and I would say, “I disagree, and this is why.” Think about this
for a moment, okay? So imagine if there’s somebody who has a very judgmental mind
or a very critical mind. So they’re feeling critical emotions and critical emotions
and critical emotions and critical emotions towards this person and this person and
this person, and they say, “Well, I don’t want to suppress my emotions, so I’m just
going to start telling everybody how I feel. And they’re critical, critical, critical,
critical. You’ll be like, “Wait a second here.” And so they literally start doing
what? Either suppressing the criticism towards everybody, or voicing the criticism
towards everybody, and neither one is good. So the real answer is transformation.
And yes, if there’s something that you need to communicate. Absolutely communicated,
of course. Communication is important and key for healthy, happy, wonderful
relationships. However, if there are patterns of feeling,
of frustration, or of anger, or upset, or hurt, or whatever it is, and a pattern,
and a pattern, and a pattern, communicating the same thing over and over, or even
just expressing the patterns over and over and over, it doesn’t become helpful, it
becomes hurtful. And not only that, but sometimes if we have a, like let’s say
somebody has a pattern towards somebody else. They’re frustrated with their husband or
wife and they realize they’re frustrated because they can’t control it. And they want
them to do what they want them to do. It’s like, well, wait a second. Maybe you
don’t have a right to be frustrated. We can’t control each other. That’s not what
we’re here for. And so I would say before just suppressing the emotion or just
communicating it, if it’s a negative emotion, really look at it, analyze it.
Is it part of a pattern? If so, be willing to change it. Is it even true? Is it
even a fair emotion? You know, sometimes people will feel really frustrated towards
somebody else and they feel that and then when they check in, they go, “Oh, I
realize I’m feeling frustrated about other things and just taking it out on that
person.” And so That’s the thing you want to really look at is not that you’re
always spraying your negative emotions everywhere. And the reason I say that is
because I can’t tell you how often people do these very things. They get into
spirituality and self -help and personal development and then they think, “Well, I
need to communicate all of my negative emotions to everybody.” And it’s like, “Well,
wait a second. What about transforming your negative emotions? What about checking
yourself about seeing is it true? Is it not true? Is it right? How to communicate?
Because ultimately, the best communication is of course from a loving place. So we
don’t want to communicate all of our emotions. Oh, I feel frustrated. I feel this
if it’s negative. Instead, it’s a lot more productive to communicate solutions, to
communicate. Even if we said, okay, well, look, I’ve been feeling this way and I’d
really love like so so it’s it feels productive so when we communicate we can
communicate with love and from a place of productivity like what do we really want
what do we want to change what needs to change what is the issue what do we want
because if we’re always just venting then of course it’s not really productive it’s
not really getting you where you want to go or creating the change in your life.
And of course, the more you can resolve the emotions and then just communicate from
love, that is incredible for relationships. So just food for thought.
And just kind of taking in that awareness just because I see that all of the time
and not necessarily, as you know from, as you can see with our beautiful volunteer,
you can see she’s just suppressing them. And by the way, You can also see that she
just, I mean, I’m sure you can feel this, how much she loves her husband and it
is just so darn sweet. It is just, I love that about her, just so, so,
so sweet, so beautiful and as far as making the change, there are a couple other
key pieces to really start shifting at a deeper level. And so that’s where we’re
going as we step back in with our beautiful volunteer, Dr. Kitt. Here we go.
Final Coaching Insights
So I’m gonna ask you to breathe and
I want you to notice all of the feelings towards this topic of the X being yada
yada, verbally abusive, etc. You see that, right? Yes, okay,
so I’m gonna ask you to breathe and
and I want you to notice the self judgments that if you’re not perfect in this and
that like how much you have the Self judgments about all of this stuff. Can you
see that big time big time? Okay, So I’m gonna ask you to breathe.
And I’m gonna ask you, what would happen if you stopped beating yourself up and you
stopped having all of these judgments? – The programming is like you would be more
abusive because being more unleashed and more critical,
uncensored, hurtful, maybe destructive, Yeah, of the things that I…
Okay, yeah.
Destructive. The program is like, “Oh, you’d be destructive.” But in the truth, it’s
like, it could be destructive of the things that are ready to fall away. But the
fear is like, it would be, “Yeah, I’d regret it.” And God,
it’s exactly, it’s huge, very significant, causing a lot of problems for me. Bingo.
Now, the other thing is, is I want to invite you even as you’re saying that, so
instead of saying it would be destructive, because how safe does it feel if
something is destructive? Yeah, it might be destructive of the things you care about.
It might be bad. Okay, well, what if you said it’s transformative? Yeah. If you’re
communicating in a way that then becomes transformative in a positive way, how does
that feel to
You’re definitely right on it, because there’s all this resistance that says as long
as I learned to do it in the right way versus like totally being unleashed,
of course. Bingo. No. Great. So I’m going to ask you to breathe. Now, notice what
you’re saying. So watch this. If I said versus totally being unleashed, which would
be be good. Okay but wait a second. If I said being free or being unleashed so
there’s a part of you when you get upset.
Yes but it’s also is afraid of it’s kind of like this is that okay let’s go like
this.
Have you ever had dogs before?
No. Oh my God. Yes. Yes. And I’ve had a history that are really like traumatic.
And we do have a super sweet dog now. Okay, so let’s go here. Let’s go here.
Exactly what’s coming up for me. It’s exactly that energy. Okay, so let’s go here.
Your current dog. How much do you have to keep him on a leash so he doesn’t run
away? Zero. Zero. So what if he’s unleashed? Yeah,
it’s actually safe. Oh. So I want you to notice how when you feel about
communicating, you’re afraid to be off leash, unleashed. Well, if you’re unleashed and
you’re out of control, that’s a problem. If you’re unleashed and you’re in control
and you’re okay, that’s a good thing. it’s freedom. This is the energy with my dad
like he just didn’t know what to do with me and so he was trying to control me
because and then maybe I just got that download like I’m not I’m not safe well no
obviously got the download because I physically was not safe okay so it did imprint
somehow that like I’m not safe to be fully amish I have to be careful okay so I’m
gonna ask you to breeze
of self -trust, of trusting self to be off leash. Now in her case there are
specific things from her childhood that are creating this and so often people can
lose trust in self for a variety of different reasons and that’s what I want to
talk about for a moment is exactly that and because if we lose trust in self it’s
harder to change. It’s harder to transform. It’s harder to feel secure in life if
you can’t even trust self. And I lost trust in myself and in my body going through
my injury. And so I want to give you a few insights regarding making sure that you
have trust with self and you really feel that. Now, one thing that I did going
through my injury to really reestablish self -trust was this. is that if I said I
was going to do something, I made sure to do it. Now, this may seem small, but
all of the time, you’ll see people who might do this. They go, “Oh, I’ll do that
today.” And then maybe they don’t feel like it. So they say, “Oh, I’m going to do
it tomorrow. I’m going to do it the next day. I’m going to do it the next day.”
Now, you might think, “Okay, well, it’s procrastination.” Yes, but it’s also Losing
trust in self, even though you may not realize it. It’s like you start to realize
you don’t trust yourself to follow through. And I see people do that all the time,
but what happens is they may not realize that it’s even affecting them,
but on the flip side, if you know that you’re a person where you do something and
you say you’re going to do it and you do it and you say you’re going to do it
and you do it and you say you’re going to do something and you do it, it is a
feeling of confidence, of trust in self that it can build so much in your life as
simple as it may or may not sound to you. And so that’s the insight actually,
and that’s the reason that I want to pause it right here is I want to invite you
to look at how to establish or strengthen trust in yourself.
You know, with myself personally, I know that I have trust in myself.
That if something occurs, I can figure it out. If there’s some type of thing to
figure out, I will do that. If I say I’m going to do something, I will follow
through. I know that about me. And of course, during my injury, I didn’t because I
would say, “Oh, I’m going to try to do this or try to do this.” And whatever it
was, and I couldn’t count on myself to show up. And it’s not a criticism. It was
re -establishing trust. And so a few things that I did to re -establish trust during
my injury was exactly that. If I said I’m going to do something, I did it. So
even as I was getting better and better, if I said that I was going to go to the
gym one day and let’s say that it even got late and I hadn’t yet gone after I
got better, I would go at like 10 o ‘clock at night, 11 o ‘clock at night, didn’t
matter. If I said I am going to go to the gym, I went. If I said and told
myself I am going to do something, I did it no matter what. Now, even before that
in my injury as I was getting better, for me to even just set a time to go do
something. So, one thing that I did is I started volunteering at this homeless
shelter. You know, as I was starting to feel better and better, I, there was this
homeless shelter that was, it was like a housing, temporary housing, where it was
like a homeless shelter, temporary housing, where women, single women with children
were basically going to look for jobs and they got help with their resume and they
were trying for jobs and then they would, and what I would do is I would go in
and play with the children. So I would go play like Connect 4 or Monopoly or
whatever it was, some type of game. So this was my volunteer service, right? And so
it was like, I think it was like every Wednesday at 11 o ‘clock. And for me to
commit to something and then go to it was also re -establishing trust.
Being there, being on time and doing that was re -establishing trust with myself
because I mean, prior to that, if I said I wanted, like especially during my injury
and getting injured, you know, I would be like, okay, I’m going to go back to
work. And then it didn’t, I failed. I couldn’t. And so doing that so many times
did, it made me lose my trust with self. And so reestablishing that trust was so
important. And so I just want to give you food for thought. Now, by the way,
Another thing that I did during my injury that I that was actually ruining my trust
with self Was actually affirmations, and so I had to stop doing them So I had been
for years during my injury doing a tons of affirmations. I am happy.
I am happy. I am healthy I’m whole healthy complete yada yada like I did all of
these different Affirmations for years like five plus years every day every day every
day writing them saying them speaking them but they weren’t true at the time and so
I it didn’t help me build trust with myself so I stopped doing them and started
rewiring my mind in a different way which was really helpful you know and a simple
thing you know like in my courses and whatnot that I teach is even just doing a
technique where it’s like sea mind, sea mind. So you’re pointing things out to your
mind that are true in a positive way instead of telling yourself things that aren’t
necessarily true. And that was, you know, there were so many key things that I did
with the mind that just tweaks or did things in a different way that were just
pivotal. And so I didn’t realize initially that telling myself, myself because I’ve
been telling myself every day during my year, “I am so happy. I am so happy.” And
I wasn’t. But I logically thought I was, but it wasn’t really creating that shift,
that feeling. But it was also telling myself, “I’m healthy.
I’m healed. All of these things.” It wasn’t healthy for me the way I was doing it,
just in affirmations and affirmations and writing it and all of that, I really
needed to rewire my mind and really think in a different way and see in a
different way and program in a different way and feel in a different way. And so
that was key. So my point is, is that really the more you can establish feelings
of trust and honesty and count on yourself, that makes you have a feeling of
confidence. And when you don’t feel like you trust yourself or you don’t feel like
your, you know, can count on you. What happens? It can increase fear and
uncertainty. Like you feel afraid of the future. You’re gonna be able to make it.
Are you gonna be successful? Are you gonna do this? Are you okay financially? Are
you okay in a relationship? Or whatever it is, it actually increases more feelings
of insecurity as well. And so just food for thought. That’s the question that want
to prompt you with today. So I want to invite you, if you will, to look at your
level of trusting self. Because as you trust self, it creates more feelings of
security, more feelings of confidence. It’s a great foundation for that. And the more
you trust self, the more you can heal, the more you can flourish in life. So it’s
really beautiful. Now, going back to Dr. Kim’s situation, as far as not trusting
herself and it’s a different programming that she has linked up. As far as that
goes, we’re going to go deeper on the next episode.
We’re going to go even deeper and look at why that was linked up at a deeper
level and that feeling of feeling like out of control or whatnot. There’s more
programming there, but first, sticking with the positive, I want to invite you to
take in the positive, to bring in the feeling of establishing or feeling, feeling,
feeling so much more trust in self, and feeling that, and embracing that.
So just food for thought today on that, and maybe even just write down one or two
things that you could do or start doing to really start increasing trust in self,
or maybe even stop doing. So maybe You might have a habit of telling yourself
you’re going to do something and then you don’t do it Okay, so maybe it’s not
telling yourself. You’re going to do something unless you really really are you know,
and it’s kind of like if you have a spouse or an employee or co -worker a boss or
Anybody friend family who constantly says I’m gonna do this and then they don’t they
say I’m gonna do this and then they don’t know You lose the ability to feel like
you can count on them even if you don’t consciously realize it. And so just those
same feelings towards self are so important to make sure that you’re nurturing that
positive connection with self. And so just food for thought, inviting you to look at
this in your own life and taking this in of feeling trust towards self because it
may seem little, but it really is an incredible foundation for confidence, for
success for flourishing. So, food for thoughts, and we’ll go in deeper on the next
episode. And for now, I ask if you could please take just a quick moment to hit
the share button on this episode. You know, share it with somebody you love,
somebody you care about, or somebody you don’t even know, because the more that
every single person feels happy and healthy and loved and loving, the better this
world is for all of us. And so, please do take just a quick moment to hit the
share button and please do make a point to have a most wonderful incredible rest of
your day and I look forward to connecting with you on the next episode. We’ll see
you there.
Closing Message
Thank you for listening to Heal Yourself Change your life. All of the time people
reach out and say how much these episodes have given them hope or touched their
heart or helped them stay positive in hard times or even woken them up to a
completely new level of awareness of how amazing we all really are. If today’s
episode touched your heart or expanded your mind in any way, please do me a favor
and be sure to share it with those you care about or those you know who really
need it. As more and more people become empowered, it really will change our world
for the better. That is the point and the power of these demonstrations is to
create a radical shift in our world consciousness by showing everyone what we are
all capable of. And of course, each volunteer will really need to follow through to
reinforce their programming to maintain their results. But the point is for you to
see that you really can create rapid results in your health and your life if you
really understand how to use your mind. You’re incredible. And I do wanna be clear
though, that most people will not get results this fast on their own. I make it
look very because of the discoveries that I made. You want to remember that there’s
so much more going on in our minds at a deeper level than people realize.
That said, if you want to send me any questions or comments, come visit me on my
website at brandygillmore.com/podcast. And if you’re currently experiencing physical
pain and would like to be a volunteer on the show, you can sign up there as well.
Lastly, please remember, if you do have any health issues, you won’t want to avoid
your doctors. Instead, you’ll want to continue seeing them and make it your goal to
blow their minds with what you’re capable of with your mind. Thank you.
